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How To Make A Monster (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

How do you make a monster? According to this 1958 film, the man to ask is Pete Dumond! As played by Robert H. Harris, Pete Dumond is the chief make-up artist at American International Pictures.  He’s so good that he can easily transform handsome teen idols like Tony Mantell (Gary Conway) and Larry Drake (Gary […]

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Robot Monster (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

If you’re a fan of old horror and science fiction movies, you can probably imagine all sorts of different types of monsters destroying or, at the very least, conquering Earth. There’s the big rubber lizards that lived over on Monster Island.  There’s the sinister humanoid aliens who have appeared in more movies than I can […]

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The Brood (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

O Canada! Our home and native land! True patriot love in all of us command. With glowing hearts we see thee rise, The True North strong and free! From far and wide, O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. God keep our land glorious and free! O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. […]

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The Amityville Horror (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

Based on a true story! (Or maybe not.  Actually, probably not…) This 1979 film tells the story of George and Kathy Lutz (James Brolin and Margot Kidder), a young married couple who move into a big house in Amityville, New York.  George and Kathy are having financial trouble so it’s good thing that they were […]

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The Final Sacrifice (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

O Canada! The 1990 film, The Final Sacrifice, opens in the snowy Canadian wilderness.  A man who I can only assume is a pro wrestler is hanging out with another man, who I can only assume is the lead singer for an emo band.  According to the film, the man in the suit is named […]

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Haunts of the Very Rich (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

The 1972 made-for-TV movie Haunts of the Very Rich opens with a lengthy shot of Lyle (Tony Bill) and Laurie (Donna Mills) sharing a very long kiss.  Obviously, they’re very happy and why shouldn’t they be?  They’re young.  They’re beautiful.  They’re in love.  They’re newly married.  And … they’re on an airplane! It’s a private plane, […]

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The Children (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

Poor Casey (Hannah Tointon)! As 2008’s The Children opens, all she wants to do is celebrate New Year’s with her friends.  Instead, her mom and her stepfather are dragging her off to some stupid house in the middle of nowhere, where she’ll have to hang out with her aunt and her dorky uncle and she’ll […]

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Audrey Rose (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

The 1977 film, Audrey Rose, tells the story of an annoying little girl named Ivy (Susan Swift), who is the daughter of annoying Janice (Marsha Mason) and annoying Bill (John Beck).  Everything seems to be perfectly normal until, one day, they notice that they’re being followed around by an annoying man named Elliott (Anthony Hopkins).  […]

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The Tower (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

The plot of 1993’s The Tower could probably best be described as, “Paul Reiser gets a job and gets everyone killed.” Technically, Paul Reiser is playing Tony Minot, a guy who would rather spend his time in his apartment, composing new age synthesizer anthems and eating left over pizza, than actually go to work.  But […]

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10/31 (reviewed by Lisa Marie Bowman)

It’s Halloween night and we all know what the means.  It’s a time for candy.  It’s a time for treats.  It’s a time for tricks.  And it’s definitely a time for a few frights.  Two costumed children sit in a dark room that is only partially illuminated by the flickering of their TV.  On the […]

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